Monday, June 11, 2012

Steep mountains..

Finally, something regarding the adoption worth posting! On Friday, I received a very simple email. It was three sentences: I have better news for you. Your file is out of IBESR. Praise the Lord. It was signed with just the initial "R". Rachel. Our coordinator. I always thought about what it would be like after 11 long months, one referral, a second referral, losing the first referral, a third referral, and the endless hours of waiting. How would it be to finally be out. To be honest, I had been working late nights last week. I worked 4p-4a. I slept at odd hours and took some cat naps here and there. I wondered as I read it if I was actually awake, or was I dreaming? I did everything I would have normally done under the circumstances, I called Tim, texted other relatives, and oh yeah, kept seeing patients. I was at work. In the last few days I have been afraid to blog about this. I was afraid it wasn't really true and somehow I am still waiting. Yet, every day when I look for the email to read it again, those same three sentences pop up in my inbox just like before. So, yes, it is true, we are out of social services. So, now what? I get to go see the babies so we can see the judge! As all of this reality hit me I found myself just in tears. It was the culmination of exhausting painful waiting and true joy as I begin to see our dreams become reality. This brings me to my latest Christian song analogy. Steven Curtis Chapman recently came out with "Long Way Home." I listen to the line,"the valleys are deeper and the mountains are steeper than we ever would have known" and it rings so true in this adoption. However, in true Steven Curtis Chapman style, he does not leave this listener in the deep valleys and steep mountains instead he says,"I know we're gonna make it. I know we're ginna get there soon, He's gonna lead me home." hearing the ibesr news, reminded me that God's gonna lead my babies home. This mama cannot wait to hold tho babies tight at the top of that steep Haitian mountain.