Mother Nature

Last night, my world was turned a bit upside down as the news of another earthquake hitting Haiti ran across my computer screen. The news said it was a 4.6 magnitude quake. I knew the big one was a 7 but still. My thoughts went to Grace as it occurred to me that in her just over two years on the planet she had already been through two earth quakes. I suppose at this point her world rocking and rolling is somewhat normal. At first, I was angry. Why another quake? Why would my children go through this again? I learned the quake was in fact, right where they are. Then, I found I was angrier. How much would they have to endure before they come home?

I then spent some time thinking about the big quake. At that time, I felt God had another child for us. I was frustrated as we are completely infertile and there didn't seem to be other opportunities and I couldn't understand God's message to me. Then, the quake hit. I watched the footage night after night. I saw the children in the streets and wondered if one of them was to be mine. I started looking at Haitian adoption. It seemed the wait times were four and five years. As drawn to it as I was, it just seemed impossible. Little by little though, the plan came into focus all leading me to this point. I suppose I have the first earthquake to thank for getting my attention, despite the devastation it left. I am having a hard time processing this earthquake though, it makes me restless and worried about my babies. The good news is, they are fine. I am now just praying that the papers keep moving so that my babies do not have to be rocked by mother nature, rather by this loving mama who misses them so much!