I really haven't blogged in over a week. I would love to say that it was yet another case of blogger's block, but that would not be quite accurate. I think more accurate would be nothing to report. The reality is our stuff is at parade rest until Grace's birth mother can work through her paperwork. I have consultation in that our coordinator is probably one of the hardest working ladies around. She will stop at nothing to get things done, but even this human dynamo has to concede to the government of Haiti. So, in the adoption front, nothing to report.
On the waiting, there is lots to report. There is this thing that happens in the waiting. It is the ability to allow doubt to begin to enter the thought process. For example, I begin to doubt this can ever come to completion. I begin to question why it is we are doing this. As I said before, there are loads of people who ask scads of questions. Why invest the money in children? Why not consider a new car, retirement, investment, anything. Usually I can fight all this off knowing in my heart of hearts this is God's plan for me, but still...the waiting. Sigh.
That brings me to this weekend. It is as if God knows what I need to get me through. this weekend was very special in the orphanage. One of my fellow mamas brought her baby home. I poured over Facebook every few hours. I first saw the pictures of them taking off, then the reuniting of the baby and the family, the step by step legal processes, the farewell, the taking off again. Today, he is home with his new family and their journey is just beginning. I saw their smiles and his contentment on his new daddy's lap and I had renewed hope that , yes, this will end someday. Then, today's message. We went to church and the series on leading a blessed life continued. As I listened, our pastor eventually brought up a scene from Charlie and The Chocolate Factory. He talked about when Charlie went home to his poor family and offered to sell his golden ticket to raise money for the family. His grandfather pointed out there was a lot of money in the world, it was printed all the time, and was really quite ordinary, but the golden ticket, there were only five of those. It reminded me that there a probably lots of ordinary things I could buy with money, but only one Alex and one Grace. At that moment my belief all those naysayers were wrong was once again renewed.
So, here I sit, nothing changed. No news, no travel dates, but able to once again know that I can face a bit more waiting, knowing my golden Grace and Alex are coming home.
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